TITLE AT THE END

(Tune: Whistling Jack Smith's only hit)

(with apologies to the Germans)

Nineteen thirteen
In alt Berlin
Was a good time to be gangster.
Kingpins of crime
Had a great time
Everyone else they had angster.
So vun dark night
I swore to fight
Dressed up in latex und Leder.
I made my plan,
Und as "Fledermaus-Mann",
I vas the first caped crusader.

I bought a car
Thought I'd go far
It vas a Daimler three-vheeler.
It ran on steam
Went like a dream
All the way back from the dealer.
I added vings
Und other things
Trying to make it look striking.
The extra load
Made the engine explode
Now I've gone back to hitch-hiking.

I had a friend
True to the end
Thought he could be my assistant.
Dressed him in style
That made him smile
He was by no means resistant.
But the poor lad
Got it real bad
Vun rainy night in the ghetto.
Now for his pay
He works in cabaret
Dancing und singing falsetto.

Then came the war
People were poor
Prices were getting gigantic
I saw my fate
Lying in wait
Somewhere across the Atlantic.
I live today
Down in LA
Taking my cut from die Filme
I think they're great
But I really should state
I vould have never cast Kilmer.

(Spoken) What a dummkopf. Keaton, now, that was different. Good old 
Buster...

As you can tell
I've lasted well
Though I am nearly ein hundert.
I can still say
Crime does not pay
Although sometimes I haf vundert.
Technologie
Doesn't scare me
I have no fears about that, man.
I still fight crime
As I did in my prime
Vhen I vas Kaiser Bill's Batman!